The mighty Matrix Coat – Mother, may I have one?

Em and I found our own Matrix Coat in Santa Barbara yesterday. We were both lusting after it. Great fit. Great look. Great sticky-shiny-techno-look vinyl. Until we saw the price tag. Ain’t no way we paying $158 for a coat like that. We’re going to make our own, that way we don’t have to worry about custody agreements and such. *drool* Can’t wait to find my Matrix Coat pattern and fabric! Mwahahaha!

Quick Solstice Run-Down:

After many irritating and useless delays, finally left the house about 20 minutes late. Em had just gotten to the station (I think) after many trials and tribulations at the Evil DMV. The trip up on Amtrak was about 35 minutes, and *cough* despite our best efforts, it was free. I mean, we went up to a guy in uniform holding out money and saying “here, take our money, we want two tickets to S.B.” and he said to go upstairs and chill. So we did. And were ignored by about eight other Amtrak dudes who were collecting tickets from everyone else. *shrug* if they actively dissuade us from trying to pay them, it’s their own fault if they don’t get paid for tickets. Sheesh.

So after that we trotted merrily up? down? along? State Street from the station, under the freeway and back up into the cloudy daylight, past the Adult Shoppe and the cops on bikes outside Ye Olde Donut Shoppe or whatever it was, past the staging area of the parade, to our ultimate goal: The Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf outside the Paseo Nuevo. After standing forever in front of two creepy old men (one of whom kept blowing into my hair — SHUDDER! EW!), purchased two mochas and settled down to watch the fun.

And was it ever disturbing! We’ve both been through Mr. Bunce’s “Introduction to Freudian Psychoanalysis” which includes Carmen Miranda in The Tutti Frutti Hat dancing with 7-foot bananas in “The Gang’s All Here.” Well, one of the first folks down the line was an old guy wearing a banana attached to a nose flute (if you’ve never seen/heard one, be thankful) and you guessed it, a tutti frutti hat. At least he wasn’t in the midriff-baring dress from the movie. Insert prayers of gratitude here.

And we mustn’t forget the girl in the stick-dancing group, surrounded by bikini tops and matching skirts/shorts/who knows what. Who was defying convention by wearing no top. Only a pair of pasties (again, if you’ve never seen ’em, be thankful. Stop drooling, guys!). And yes, there was another old man wandering down the street, rubbernecking to watch every jiggle.
And the Seuss-ian characters with the long beaks, the “Weapons of Mass Creation” inspectors with white paper suits and “detectors” made from household appliances and painted blue. The hula dancers who were actually good. The ski folks. The gorgeous dragons! Em and I are going to make sets of wings too. *drool*

And the Las Vegas-style senior citizens on their high heels (yes, the guys too) and skimpy outfits (groan, yes the guys too!). The stand-out was the guy in a loincloth. We later decided that it was a thong or something equally icky with revealing flaps of fabric tacked on front and back. Waving in the wind. It was nasssssty. And all this after reading the “parade rules” which stated “if we can see through it or around it, you’re naked and in violation.”

*shudder* Santa Barbara has quite a collection of old guys with weird taste.

There is an orange balloon floating around the house, that has an affinity for my head. It stayed on my head from the beginning of the parade, through a store or two, and then sat in my bag for the rest of the day. Static electricity is cool.

Got a pair of ultra-dangly earrings, posts with about 4 inches of chains and stars on the ends. Fun, except when I turn my head and the stars hit my teeth. Em gets a kick out of that.

Mostly just rambled through the various SB stores and then to the park by the Catholic Church (near Folk Mote). Can’t remember its name but it was full of booths and food and vendors. Quite fun. We found butterfly wings there. More inspiration.

On our way back toward the station, went into a vintage/costume shop with lots of overpriced fun outfits. Where we found The Matrix Coat (see above). Drool.

After a few more distractions, finally made it to the station with about 10 minutes to spare, hopped on the train, and had a math lesson. The dude who (5 minutes before reaching Ventura) decided that he was actually going to take our tickets got confused. First we said, “we got on in Santa Barbara.”
He said “no you didn’t, it’s $14 if you got on there, it’s $8 if you got on in Carpinteria.”
So he took a $20 bill from Em in order to buy two $8 tickets.
He didn’t have 4 ones, so I give him 5 ones in exchange for a $5 bill.
So then he gets confused.

16 from 25 is 9. So he needs to give us $9. Well, he gave me a $5. Which took care of the singles he needed to give Em $4. But he took about 2 minutes to figure it out, despite us telling him “$4. $4. $4!” Idiot.

Anyway, he finally gave her the change and we got off in Ventura. Still, can’t beat $8 for a round trip to Santa Barbara, especially when they were quoting $19.20 on the website!

Hehehe. Amtrak is stupid. No wonder they can’t break even, let alone make a profit! Hehehe.

*grin* All in all, a fun day. Now I have to go find fabric for our Matrix Coats.

~ by jackelopette on June 22, 2003.

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